Oct 28, 2009

Whimsical Wednesday

To make up for missing last week I have two Hallowe'en stories for you.


True Australian Halloween Ghost Story

John Bradford, a Sydney University student, was on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark Halloween night and in the midst of a storm. The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car slowly coming towards him and stopped. John, desperate for shelter and without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door, just to realize there was nobody behind the wheel and the engine wasn't on!

The car started moving slowly. John looked at the road and saw a curve approaching. Scared, he started to pray, begging for his life. Then, just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and turned the wheel. John, paralysed with terror, watched how the hand appeared every time they came to a curve. John saw the lights of a pub down the road so, gathering strength, jumped out of the car and ran to it.

Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and asked for two shots of tequila. He then started telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized he was crying and... wasn't drunk.

About 15 minutes later, two guys walked into the same pub. They were also wet and out of breath.

Looking around and seeing John Bradford sobbing at the bar, one said to the other, "Look, Bruce. There's the idiot who got in the car while we were pushing it."

* * * * * * * * * *

And this one is an oldie, but a goodie:



A man is walking home alone late one foggy night when behind him he hears:

Bump . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him

FASTER . . .

FASTER . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.

However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping!

clappity-BUMP . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

The terrified man runs.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.

Bumping and clapping toward him.

The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!

Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket . . .

and,

The coffin stops.

:-)

4 comments:

Jamie D. said...

*Groan!*

The first one was funny...but goodness C - that last one? LOL

C R Ward said...

Yeah, that last one was such a groaner I couldn't help but include it. :-)

Erica said...

LOL! Those were great :)

Benjamin Solah said...

Oh, I love the first one!